Let’s first talk about what women were not created for. Women were not created to fulfil men’s sexual desires, to give pleasure to men, to get used by men, to get beaten by men. Women were not created to be raped or to be harassed or to be abused
Women were created to be loved. They were created to be respected. They were created to maintain peace in the world. Women are not strong physically. Women are supposed to help men emotionally and men are supposed to be the protectors and helpers of women. But in some instances, this situation is opposite – which causes a lot of problems.
As it is known, (but only few agree with it) that the only difference between men and women is that, women can give birth to a child and can also feed that child from her breasts. But according to some immoral perceptions of people the image of a women in a society is of a second class person who is just an ‘object’ (or a toy, you can say) for men. That a man can use women whenever he wants to (e.g. when he is stressed or depressed he has a right to beat her. And when he is in a mood of joy he can use her as a pleasure). And that a woman should do household works only. It is not nature which decided what women should do and what women should not do. The difference here is made by us, by society.
We are middle class people living in a middle class society, which is advanced and relatively modern. But here, some people still think that a working woman does not deserve respect or is not respectable as she should be doing household works. Here a lady who asks for divorce is considered as someone of ‘bad character.’ Even someone who gets married after her divorce is not considered a good woman, or a woman who is having some male friends or colleagues. It’s a saying that ‘People only think from their way of perception and here the way of perception of some is that a women should bear everything her husband is doing to her. If he is beating her, she should tolerate it. She cannot take a stand against physical and mental torture. Why? Maybe because society (people) never supports women. Or in our society women are considered as second class citizens. Some never think of women as human.
As cinemas have a very great impact on our society (or you can say that our society is being ruined by TV and films), everyone knows about the vulgar item songs getting fame nowadays. Such songs should be banned because in the lyrics are unacceptable, the clothes women wear are unacceptable and the way women dances around a huge number of men is unacceptable by our culture, society and most important our religion. But still, we watch them repeatedly and use to enjoy them. We use to play them on loud speakers thinking it will look ‘cool.’ Our society is turning blind. Films should stop portraying women as an ‘item’ or an ‘object’. The way actresses and celebs are portrayed in the media is horrendous. Today, item-numbers have become a must, with vulgar and shameless lyrics and showing off half (or more than half) naked women in the name of entertainment. It’s very disturbing that words such as item-girl, object, hot chick have become acceptable and the female-leads themselves are performing and encouraging these so called ‘item-numbers’ in an Islamic country, Pakistan. And even in our neighbouring countries, where in their culture and religion it is also unacceptable. Why we have never seen a man doing an ‘item song’? (Ever thought about this?)
A man was once asked in an interview on what is his perception about women. He said, “I am from a small town (village) where I have seen in every house since I was a child that men used to beat their wives brutally. In our villages if a man holds his child in his arms, it was not considered a manly act as it is only women’s job. In my house I have seen my grandfather beating my grandmother every day and my father doing the same to my mother on such small issues (like if they served dinner a little late). I did the same with my wife. From childhood, I thought of women as objects. To use them whenever you need to. To beat them even if they are sick or to have sex with them even if they don’t want to. One day, I thought that I just raped my wife because I had sex without her will. That was the day; I saw a huge change in myself. I started respecting her. I started helping her. I started holding my kids in my arms and I used to kiss them on their cheeks. I even used to wash my kid’s dirty clothes. My wife always asked me not to do to these things or others will gossip about us. But I used to tell her that it doesn’t matter what others will think. We are happy and that’s all. Now it’s been five years and I never shout at my wife for anything.”
Some people used to think that ‘all women are same’, ‘all women are frauds or cheaters’, ‘all women are characterless’, or ‘all women are objects ’except for the women in their house. Like their sisters, mothers, wives and daughters. Isn’t it funny? It is so aggressive. Like you can use someone else’s daughter for your desires. But yes, you will not allow your daughter or sister to fulfil someone else’s improper needs. Every boy out there must have faith in karma! And must think once about the women dependent on him while using any other woman for such inappropriate requirements.
Amitabh Bachchan, one of the most famous actors of the world once said in an interview “Everyone in the society is equal. I’ll tell you how I got to learn this. I studied at Delhi University. Miranda house was a famous girls’ college there. A bus stand was there, right opposite to Miranda house. Boys would go there to see beautiful girls that came out of the college and they used to tease them. Miranda house then had an annual play and they needed some boys for that. I was the one chosen from my college and some other boys were chosen from other colleges. We were so happy that finally we got a chance to get in. It was a hostel. First day when we get inside the hostel, girls were sitting upstairs and for the first time we saw girls whistling at us. They said ‘just look at them walk. Look how weird his trouser is.’ That was when I realised what girls go through when we do this to them.”
Men are nothing without women and should understand the value of every woman. A man and woman need each other in every aspect of life. Women are not objects. Films should stop portraying women as ‘items’ or ‘objects’. Instead of posting sarcastic posts related to movies like phantom (etc., We should take stand for the betterment of our country and for the betterment of society and should take stand against vulgar item songs. Those songs should get banned in an Islamic country like ‘Pakistan’. We should support rape victims. – Instead of telling them that there are thousands of women who are being raped every day and chose to keep quiet because they could have gotten killed or that they have ruined family’s honour and now cannot take any stand. And that it was written in their fate or that they should marry their rapists. We should not consider them as a living dead and that their life is over. We should support women. Instead of telling them that there are thousands of women who are beaten every day by their husbands and it will not cause anything if you’ll be counted one in those thousands.
Guest Post By: Omama Moin Siddiqui.